Happy Birthday Mom

March 9th was my mom's birthday. She has been gone now almost a full year. She died just a week after turning 82. I miss her. I haven't wrote anything on my blog about her death because I haven't been ready .... still not ready, but this blog is a place for me to record my memories and thoughts so I best start. This was a photo of her last birthday.  Trudi has that sweater now and is going to make heirloom aprons with the rosettes for all the girls - it will be a treasure. 

I thought the her birthday would be a difficult and sad day, but I was surprised that I felt so at peace the whole day.  At moments I felt even happy and grateful for the beautiful day. It felt like spring so Rosie and I decided to go for a morning walk. During the walk a Cardinal flew out directly in front of our path and landed in the tree next to us. It seemed to be looking down at me as I stood watching it. I took it as a sign from my mom. She loved Cardinals. Some believe Cardinals are a sign from heaven that a loved one is watching over you. Seeing that Cardinal made my day. 

I miss talking to you mom ... every day I think about you. So many things I wish I had a chance to ask you, but it's too late now. One thing I recently had an epihinay about is that I never realized what a difficult decision it must have been for both you and dad to decide to keep me when you learned that you were pregnant with your 6th child. Without going into too much detail on my blog as to the reasons I'll just leave it as a thank you for giving me life .... You didn't have to and some may have said maybe you shouldn't have, but I'm obviously glad you did!  Love you mom.  Give Dad a kiss for me In heaven.